Human Flourishing and the role of “3rd Spaces”
Some days when I arrive for work at the Christ Center, I begin with prayer. To be clear, this is the odd exception to my usual routine of grabbing a coffee (my third cup of the day) and mindlessly jumping into emails and tasks. Even when I do manage to restrain myself from what my wife refers to as “work mode” for a few minutes and turn to prayer, I usually just spend some time in silence with God. I’m not really trying to say anything, change anything, or hear anything.
But a couple weeks ago, I did hear something. Out of the blue, I felt like God was saying that the most important work we do at the Christ Center is running our physical ministry spaces (Four Winds Coffee Shop in the US and Cuatro Vientos in Spain).
I was surprised. Of all the ministry that we do, running our physical locations might be the least “spiritual.” This “ministry” involves a good deal of scheduling, groundskeeping, light bulb-changing, cardboard box recycling, and (I shudder to think of it) mopping. Wouldn’t Jesus be more excited about our prayer meetings and outreach events, our efforts to feed hungry students, or our scholarships to send students and the good news around the world?
It was with this question rattling around my head that someone shared an article with me about two iconic 90’s sitcoms–Friends and Seinfeld. The article was investigating the idea of “3rd spaces.” This is an idea developed by Ray Oldenburg, a 20th century sociologist, to describe a location that isn’t home or work, but rather a 3rd social space such as cafes, clubs, bars, libraries, churches, parks, plazas, barber shops, etc.
The article used popular TV shows to display the steady extinction of 3rd spaces in modern society. It said that, “The characters of the biggest shows of the ’90s — “Friends,” “Seinfeld,” “Cheers” — spent the overwhelming majority of their time hanging out at the café, diner, and bar, and work was either an afterthought or a running joke. In today’s biggest shows — “Succession,” “Superstore,” “Industry” — work is all-consuming, and life beyond it is an afterthought or, in the case of “Severance,” wholly inaccessible” (Alibs, 2023)
As most friendships have shifted increasingly towards the workplace or online communities, 3rd spaces have begun to shrink or disappear entirely. Attendance at church, social clubs, gyms, and community gathering places of every kind has plummeted in the past 20 years. This has led to a decrease in social connection that has never been seen before with, “40% of individuals saying their major source of companionship is either a pet or a television” (Staff, The Week 2019).
Our modern Western perspective might lead us to believe that a person could still be happy with such an existence. Afterall, we tend to view happiness on an individualized scale–something that we can shift up and down of our own volition.
From a Christian perspective, however, this loss of connection and, therefore, friendship is a major impediment to human happiness. This is because the biblical authors clearly show human flourishing happening primarily in community with other people. Christianity is never described as individual seekers on their own spiritual journeys, but as a community of Christ-followers seeking to live well together and hold all things in common.
…
I think our ministry at the Christ Center of providing 3rd spaces is worth more than we can quantify. I don’t know how many meaningful, Holy Spirit filled encounters happen at Four Winds every day. I’m not sure how many friendships have been formed at our weekly student suppers.
I know that when I was a student at CMU, I happened to run into the guy who was the staff member for InterVarsity Christian Fellowship while I was having coffee at the Christ Center. Because of this random encounter, I found a Christian community to call home, one that would shape me greatly. I would go on to work for InterVarsity for five years after college. (And I still work for that same “guy;” he’s just the director of the Christ Center now.)
The point is…my whole life story changed because of this “3rd space” interaction.
I also went on my first date with my wife at the Christ Center. I awkwardly confessed my feelings over a Vanilla Chai Latte in a room full of strangers. Again, my whole life changed because of this space.
Four Winds is a place where I’ve met millionaires and people living on the street. It’s a place where 20-somethings gather to study scripture (shout out to Chad and the Boyz) and where 70 year-old old men gather to do the same. It’s a place for counselors and relators and multi-level marketing schemes. It’s a place for first dates and long (maybe too long) prayer meetings. Maybe it’s just the kind of organized chaos within which our Creator likes to do his good work.
Jesus spends so much of the gospels in temples, weddings, public swimming pools, watering wells, gardens, public beaches. He is not content to be a spiritual guru to which others must travel. Much like the tabernacle of the Old Testament, Jesus is God on the move.
So we humbly continue to create space for students or non-students to share a meal or a coffee together. And we pray that by doing so the Christ Center is providing holy ground for Jesus to do His good work. By His grace, may it be so…
Alibs. “The Death of Third Places and the Evolution of Communities.” Medium, ILLUMINATION, 26 Jan. 2023, medium.com/illumination/the-death-of-third-places-and-the-evolution-of-communities-5bbffc01c5e#:~:text=In%20the%2020th%20century%2C%20sociologist,the%20anchor%20of%20our%20community.
Staff, The Week. “An Epidemic of Loneliness.” Theweek, The Week, 6 Jan. 2019, theweek.com/articles/815518/epidemic-loneliness.